I know it’s still 3 months before my birthday. But I can’t help but want to picture out what could possibly happen, or what I wish to happen during that day. For once, I want to be surprised. I’ll be entering school and pretend that nothing’s up, that it’s not my birthday. My friends will do the same. And by the end of the day, I would receive a bouquet of roses, just a small and simple cake, and they would all greet me a happy birthday. I want a simple picnic, as long as my friends are there, I want to have it by the candle light, or something of that sort. I want to celebrate it with my family – Mum, Dada and Teng – the four of us.
I could use a new dress or top. A new secular book, and another by a Christian author. I want to fly a floating lantern on my 20th birthday, or simply just fly a balloon with a wish, so I could cross it out from my bucket list. A new phone may do, but that could possibly a gift to myself. I want either a Star Wars or Stitch merchandise. These things are just simple, and I know it may sound too materialistic, but it’s okay for me not to have it all. As long as the next one be granted.
Most of all, I pray to grow in God’s grace more. It will be my 10th birthday that I’ll celebrate knowing Christ, and I want to know Him better. I pray to be used in the ministry more often. I pray that He’ll guide me as I go and strive to live for Him better. I pray for my spiritual growth, for His guidance in my journey. I pray for more wisdom and strength in facing every challenge that’ll come my way. I pray for my relationship with Him. I pray for my maturity and the continuity of my change. I pray that I pray more before and after I turn 20.
I am not getting any younger. I know that material things can never match the things that are unseen – friendship, love, hope, faith, God. It would be nice to have it all. But I know God has His plans when and where He’ll give it all to me. If I could have it all on my birthday, I’ll be thanking Him for it all. These things are what I want for my 20th birthday. But God’s love for me? That’s the thing I am blessed to have, because that’s what I want the most.