I’m saying goodbye to the girl who was naive. I’m not going to cling to childish reactions anymore. I’m going to say goodbye to the easily stressed person I was and always remind myself to not be anxious and pray without ceasing. I will open my mind and listen when others point out my mistakes, only so I could be better. I’m saying hello to someone who knows what she’s doing and how to react properly, someone who, despite having experienced a lot, is still humble enough to take in criticisms – both negative and positive, someone who knows how to accept things because she knows that God works all things together for her good and others.
I’m saying goodbye to the girl who was insecure. I’m putting up Psalm 139:14 on my tab as my wallpaper to remind me that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I’m going to embrace how I look, my weight, my weaknesses, my flaws and my imperfections, because I know that what is inside matters most, not what meets the eye. I’m saying hello to someone who does not get easily dragged down by judgmental people, someone who loves and accepts herself enough to radiate that same love towards others because she knows she was made in God’s image and likeness and He made her just the way He needs her to be.
I’m saying goodbye to the girl who was emotional. I’ve deleted and will still be deleting my old Facebook posts, my very hugot and sentimental tweets, and my ancient Tumblr posts. I’m bidding the drama goodbye and I’ll be offering it all up to prayer, an act I should have been doing a long time ago. I’m saying hello to someone who knows how to handle everything well because she knows God’s grace is sufficient. Someone who knows when to say something because she has something to say, someone who knows how to keep quiet because she knows that a soft answer turns away wrath.
I’m saying goodbye to the girl who was scared. I’m praying for the courage I need to ask for forgiveness to those I have wronged and to forgive those who have wronged me – in time. I’m leaving behind all the fears that dragged me for the past years. I’m closing my doors to the fears that have held me from growing up, not only growing old. I’m saying hello to someone who’s brave enough to take risks, someone who knows when to say sorry and when to forgive, someone who’s not easily trampled on because she knows God is her Anchor and her firmest Foundation.
I’m saying goodbye to the girl who was unproductive. I’m going to make sure I don’t count the hours, but I’ll make my hours count. I’m going to exert every effort, with all the strength He will provide so I can do everything I need to accomplish every single day of the week. I’m going to be persistent until I reach who God has planned me to be, until I stay where God wills me to stay. I’m saying hello to someone who knows when to say no when the load is too heavy, someone who dislikes to waste her time on things that will not bring her any good, someone who could seize the day but still puts God first because she knows that if she seeks God’s kingdom first and His righteousness, all she needs will be given to her – in fact even more.
I know the past is a vital part of who we are in the present and what our future will be, but I’m saying goodbye to the old me. This is the girl, letting go – of all the fears, the pain, the insecurities, the juvenility, – and letting God. This is the girl, willing to live out what Proverbs 3:5-6 actually means.
I’m saying goodbye to the girl I was because tomorrow, I welcome the changed, strong woman God wills me to be.